xXx 3 yeas xXx
Where does time go? I rite the same thing every year, but seriously, every year comes round so quick! We went and put flowers where it happened tonight :(, there was loadz of flowers so every1 knows that we dont forget. I miss u so so much, and wish I could just rewind time and stop all this from happenin! Watch over us all, Miss & Love u always
xxx
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Love,
Phyllis and Lil Benjamin
Where did that smile go?
The one you saved just for me
A smile between mother and son
Where for all the world to see
Created in an instant
At the moment of your birth
A smile that warmed your soul
And gave me heaven on earth
Where did that smile go
The one that was mine alone
I cannot seem to find it
It isn't in are home
I have looked everywhere in your room
I've hunted high and low
I'm feeling lost without it
I really miss it so
Where did that smile go
The one that could melt my heart
I would have hidden you away
If i know we'd have to part
It's lonely here without you
It's a shadow life i lead
And tucked in every moment
is a sad and painful need
Were did that smile go
The one were love shone through
Where each day was very special
If i shared that day with you
That smile is now my comfort
It's in my very soul
That smile is breathing life
To fill an empty hole
It isn't in your bedroom
A silly place to start
That smile has never left me
It's living in my heart
light a candle,
see it glow,
watch it dance,
when you feel low,
think of me,
think of light,
I'll always be here,
day or night,
a candle flickers,
out of sight,
but in your heart,
I still burn bright,
think not of sadness,
that I'm not near,
think of gladness,
and joyous cheer,
I have not left,
I am not gone,
I'm here to stay
my little one,
so when you light a candle
and you see it glow
and you watch it dance
in your heart you'll know
that I would never leave you
even when you feel so blue
I'm sitting up here with the Lord
and now watching over you
XxXxX Hi, E. I hate the next four days something silly will happen and all the pain I felt then comes back ten fold as if it had just happend,Icant help it, I start to snap everyones head off (I dont mean too) I Will be going up to put some flowers for you, to let them know that even if thay have forgoten what they have done we have not. It's still very hard for me to move on I still miss you so much. Nichola is 18 soon and she wants a do I feel so bad, I want to get into doing it but I cant right now, I just keep remembering yours and wishing you were here for hers, but you wont be. Im hopeing I will be up for sorting it out in a week or so. we wanted the working mans club but they dont hire it out to non members now. We have got a hall but thats all at the moment. will keep you up dated love you my baby boy XxXxX
XxXxX Hi mate I have just been to kirstys 21 her boy friend asked her to marrie him (I have nothing to say to that). Im now home and its my birthday its my big one and I feel lost no one is up to take the mick out of me being 50 I dont know what to do I need you here to take the piss. the girls at work got me two fifty balloons but Jamie wanted them so he now has them. I would give anything (but nichola and ryan)that you were still here I miss you so much and love you my baby boy XxXxX
Hi Babe, miss u, it was Jade's 21st party 2day, it was sooo weird 2 think 3years has passed since her 18th party wen u wudnt get off the trampoline, Luke floored u n u switched, kate was cryin n im sure that was the night ryan spat on james' trainer and then we all got in the cab back 2 urs?!?
We watched Arsenal - Man U 2day, i was goin crazy the WHOLE house was Chelsea supporters so they were all hatin on my football shirt haha!
Wish I cud hear your voice again, miss u every single day, love always xXx
xXx Happy Birthday xXx
Hi babe, another Birthday has been and gone, i think there all gona start rollin into one soon. Went 2 urs on friday n think u was there?! Seen the chelsea shirt ur dad got u, it was really nice but made me upset, specially thinkin that it will never be worn. I went out on ur birthday n had a couple of drinks on u, they were probably the "couple too many" coz the aftermath wasnt 2 pretty haha! Seen Kevin in Kensington the other day n made me think about u and where u wud b now. Time goes so fast but u cud of done so much in these last 2 n a half years... it feels weird that we're all gettin older, and ur birthdays go by but all we know is the 19year old u, nothing more. Life is so unfair, the sayin is true that God always takes the best. He took u, and michael, and Kylie all wayyy too soon. Miss u so so so much, u've got such a big space in my life even though ur not here... Love u always, and hope u had a good birthday wateva u were doin. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
XxXxX Hi E, We are going on holiday soon we are going to spain(I know you are up there laughting and saying about time)we are going with the gang so should be good fun. We only have flights going out do not have flights back yet (dont ask long story) you never know might not come back I might find a rich man.Ryan only wants to fly dont think he is bothered much about eneything else. Nichola is driving me mad every day it's so many days to go this has been going on for the last two months. We are sharing an appartment with rich and wendy, kirsty and jamie are staying with chris and jess. I wish you were here to see jamie he is so funny when you ask him his mame he tells you his hole name jamie ian bar (he sometimes gets lost at the end)at the moment he keeps spiting and blowing bubbles with his spit when you tell him to stop he just laughts at you and tells you to shut your breath, i could eat him. I have to go now and see if I can get us a flight home. I will leave your birthday cards at home with your dad so have a good one, come and have a drink with us in spain as we will be haveing a drink for you there. Love you and miss you baby boy. XxXxX
Just got back from a mad weekend in Bristol, it was so weird coz Ive bin avoidin the place and last time I went there was wiv u. I have 2 overcome these fears sometimes tho, specially coz Sineads back livin there! It was a gud weekend, but bought back some good memories, like u actually cookin us all breakfast lol, and goin shoppin 2 buy ur jacket. Miss u so much, things like that make it harder.. lv u always xxxx
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